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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27862086">i’ll help you through it all</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Umbrella Academy (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Denial of Feelings, Drinking to Cope, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Feelings, Unresolved Tension</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 23:40:16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,258</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27862086</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>If he could no longer do that at the academy then he would simply find some other place to do it; somewhere where he didn’t have to follow rules or worry about being too excessive with his violent force.</p><p>—<br/>gets drunk after being kicked out of the academy</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Diego Hargreeves &amp; Eudora Patch, Diego Hargreeves/Eudora Patch</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>i’ll help you through it all</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The loud music that plays through the speakers ricochet in his pounding ears. The balmy temperature in the loitered room increases, sodding the black shirt that was clad against his chest. He sits alone at the bar, chugging down his sixth shot of the night. His vision begins to blur, his words are slurring but he absentmindedly disregards the consequential effects that it will uphold over him later as he continuously takes shot after shot.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">His coffee brown, clouded pupils gander over the rim of his glass as he brings it up to his parted lips and allows the bitter liquid to chisel him into a faded trance. Diego leers around the populous room, glancing at the inebriated club goers as they were dancing provocatively against each other or either engaging in jovial conversations. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He knew that he was consuming more alcohol than needed and that he would unfortunately have to deal with the consequential affects of his drunken stupor afterwards. But, still he picked up the drink and easily chugged the bitter liquid down his throat. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hands, Diego gestures a hand airily waving the bartender down. <br/>
<br/>
The strawberry blonde who was occupied wiping down the bar counter and cleaning up the remnants of trash that was loitered around, glanced up at him after realizing that he was vying for her attention. Sighing softly, she wipes her hands onto the fabric of the black loose fitted apron that was tied around her waist before making her way over to him. <br/>
</span>
</p><p class="p1">“Yes?” She asks rhetorically, already well aware that he desired another shot of tequila. Though he wasn’t as drunk as some of the other attendees she could see that he was creeping along that precipice. </p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">She obtained the skill of knowing which customers were capable of holding their liquor. From the looks of it he wasn’t one of them. His head lulled side to side in a swaying motion, his eyes were brimmed red and were struggling to stay open. <br/>
</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He looked a mess; disheveled and unkempt. From the sullen looked that lingered in his eyes she could tell that he’d had a bad day and was trying to numb that pain my drowning in alcohol.</span>
</p><p class="p1">She knew that feeling too well.  </p><p class="p1">He burped, wincing inwardly as a burning feeling throngs through the crevices of his body. He shudders through pain, picking up his glass and extending it towards her.</p><p class="p1">“ I wan-‘nother one.” He mutters, words messily slurring together. <br/>
<br/>
The bartender purses her lips together as she guaged his current state. She couldn’t continue enabling him to drink when he was like this. They were allowed to deny services to customers who they believe were at their exceeding limit and although he wasn’t nearly as rancorous and rowdy as previous customers had been, she couldn’t sit here and indulge into his misery. </p><p class="p1">Retrieving the shot glass from him, she moves it towards the mixing station out of his reach. “Do you have someone that can come pick you up?” <br/>
<br/>
Diego blinked at her, face twisting in an annoyed scowl. “I asked for another drink save the lecture. I don’t want to hear it.” He grumbled. <br/>
<br/>
The bartender rolls her eyes, completely unfazed by his sudden hostility as she had grown used to it from drunk customers. </p><p class="p1">“Well, you’re not getting another one because you’re drunk. Too drunk to be making smart decisions right now.” She declares and Diego has to resist the urge of scoffing at her authoritative assertions. <br/>
<br/>
“That’s the point. I don’t <em>want</em> to think about anything. I want to forget. So please, just, spare the lecture and pour another drink.” <br/>
<br/>
She folds her arms beneath her chest as she heeds at him, staring in contemplation. She wasn’t going to give him anything strong, just something that would hold him over enough so that she could distract him. <br/>
<br/>
“Okay,” She nods her head, pushing herself off of the counter. “I’ll only do it <em>if</em> you give me your phone so that I can call someone to pick you up after this.” She bargains, to which Diego now audibly scoffed. <br/>
<br/>
“You do know that I can just go to another bar right? One where they can continue giving me drinks instead of refusing to serve me.” </p><p class="p1">The bartender shrugged, nonplussed by his challenge. “You could try. We bartenders all know each other around here and I could just call them up, give them a description of what you look like and tell them not to serve you.” It was a blatant fib, but she couldn’t allow him to sulk in his misery any longer. <br/>
<br/>
Diego was either to drunk or too annoyed  to catechize the truth behind that statement because he conceded wearily in agreement. “<em>Fine</em>.” He mutters abhorrently, reaching into his pocket to receive his phone. </p><p class="p1">The bartender smiles in triumph at her coaxing. She retrieves the phone from him after he unlocks it before turning around to fix him a drink. She fixes the shot glass drink; consisting of only a small pour of liquor and the rest being diluted with club soda. The taste of it would be awful but luckily he’s too drunk to notice the difference. </p><p class="p1">She scrolls through his call log, searching for an emergency contact. “Hm, I don’t think I want your mom seeing you like this.” She mutters lowly under her breath, scrolling her finger past the ‘home’ contact information. Her scrolling is interrupted by a flashing notification. At the top of his screen she sees an incoming message from someone named ‘Dora’. </p><p class="p1">“Someone named Dora just texted and asked where you were and if you were okay. They seem like they care about you, why don’t I call them?” Diego’s whole demeanor changed upon hearing the mention of Eudora’s name rolling off of the bartenders tongue. His head snapped up, shoulders went taut, eyes widened. </p><p class="p1">“Eudora?” He asks, repeating her name. The bartender nodded, holding the phone up to show him the message. “No, no. I-don’t call her okay. S-She can’t see me like this.” His face flushed in chagrin at the mere thought of Eudora walking in and spotting him like this; all pathetic and brooding. She had already witnessed him getting haughtily chewed out by the Captain for his rebellious behavior before eventually getting expelled from the academy. She probably already thought he was a loser. He couldn’t risk her seeing his misery up close in person. </p><p class="p1">“Too late. I just sent her the address.” She says, sliding the phone back over to him. <br/>
<br/>
Diego’s eyes widened in horror. “<em>What</em>?”</p><p class="p1">“Look,” She sighed, tossing the dry cloth that she used to wipe up a wet ring on the counter, aside. “She obviously cares about you enough to want to make sure that you’re okay. And you obviously like her otherwise you wouldn’t be so freaked about her seeing you like this. She was the only person to text to see if you were okay. She cares. <em>Let</em> her.” With that, she bidded Diego a goodbye before trotting off to the other side of the bar to attend to other customers. <br/>
<br/>
Diego groaned as he drops his head in his hands. He can’t believe that Eudora was about to witness him like this. He would get up and leave, make a abrupt departure before she arrives but he was too drunk and discombobulated to think, let alone move without stumbling over. </p><p class="p1"><em>Fuck</em>. Maybe she was right, he had reached his excess and needed someone to assist him back home. He just wishes that person wasn’t the woman that he was secretly crushing on.</p><p class="p1">Miraculously, Diego managed to stagger his way towards the bathroom of the bar. He cleaned his sweat soddened face, splashing water onto it hoping that it would help him look not so––disheveled. He dried his face clean with a paper towel then made his egress from the bathroom. Walking back to his perched seat at the bar counter, he halts his movement mid-gait when he sees Eudora. <br/>
<br/>
She’s standing in the middle of the room, her back’s facing him but he was able to recognize her without any hesitation. Her head shifted from left to right as if she was searching for someone, for <em>him</em>. </p><p class="p1">He swallowed thickly, wiping his sweaty hands on the fabric of his pants. He really didn’t want her to see him like this but he had no choice. She was already here plus he really did need to get home. His head was throbbing and he was beginning to feel queasy at the malodorous smell that lingered around the room. </p><p class="p1">Licking his dry lips, Diego inwardly mistered up enough courage as he sauntered over to her. Genially laying a hand on her shoulder so that he wouldn’t startle her, he leans close to her ear whispering her name. His cheeks flushed when she hastily turned around, her eyes widen in mirth. He’s surprisingly taken aback when she’s suddenly wrapping her arms around him and pulling him into a tight hug. </p><p class="p1">He melts into the feeling of her body wrapped around his, he could smell the saccharine sweetness of her perfume lingering in his nostrils, filling his senses. Her chest pressed tightly against his almost leaving no room whatsoever for imagination. Her lips brush against his ear as she holds him; his face nuzzles against her neck as he breathes her fragrance in. </p><p class="p1">They’ve hugged on a few occasions; mostly quick congratulatory hugs when either of them were successful in their training at the academy or goodbye hugs when they’d finished for the day and were about to part ways. <br/>
<br/>
But they’ve never hugged like this; so <em>intimately </em>and god, Diego feels like he could almost cry at how perfect she feels wrapped up in his arms. </p><p class="p1">“I was so worried about you. I’ve been calling and texting all night but you didn’t answer.” She says and a pang of guilt gnaws at him upon hearing the heavy worrying lilting in her voice. </p><p class="p1">He had seen her name flashing across his screen numerous times throughout the night, phone buzzing with messages from her asking if he was okay and where he’s been. He ignored each of the notifications, too embarrassed from his current failure. He already saw the way she looked at him at the academy when he walked out of the locker room with his bags in his hands and shoulders slumped; with pity and sympathy. </p><p class="p1">He didn’t want her looking at him like that. He couldn’t bear it.</p><p class="p1">But now after seeing and hearing how worried she was about him, only made Diego feel a million times worse than what he already felt. </p><p class="p1">He aches for her contact again when she detangles her arms from around his neck and stepped back to heed him in. It was obvious that she smelled the liquor seeping from his clothes and lingering on his breath. </p><p class="p1">There goes that look of pity and disappointment again. </p><p class="p1">“My car’s parked out front. You can stay over at my place tonight.” She offers, nudging her head towards the exit at the front door. <br/>
<br/>
He’s apprehensive, not wanting to be a burden. She already drove all the way down here to pick him up, he would only further impose if he stayed the night over at her place. </p><p class="p1">“You don’t have to do that.” He shakes his head. </p><p class="p1">“I know that I don’t have to. I <em>want</em> to. Let’s go.” She adamantly asserts and it’s not soon before he’s trailing his feet along walking behind her in tow as they weaved their way through the crowd of dancing bodies, making their path to the front door. <br/>
<br/>
Her small, cherry red car comes into his view as soon as he steps outside of the bar. The alarm chirps twice as she unlocks it. She opens the door to the driver’s seat, sliding into the seat with ease. Diego follows suit, climbing into the passenger seat. </p><p class="p1">—</p><p class="p1">The car ride’s quiet save for the soft hymn of the radio playing in the background on low while she drove. Diego kept his gaze focused to the left, looking out of the window purposefully avoiding Eudora’s gaze. Through the reflection in the window he could see her sneaking a few glances over at him. </p><p class="p1">They arrive at her condo nearly twenty minutes later. It was nice; way nicer than the shitty one bedroom apartment he was currently residing in. She turns off the ignition and retrieves the key, opening her door. From his view, Diego could see that she was approaching over on his side to help him out of the car. </p><p class="p1">He climbed out, shutting the door behind him before she could make her way over to him. She didn’t appear to be fazed by his behavior as she still walked over to him and grabbed ahold of his forearm, carefully helping him as they made their way to the front door. Truthfully, he was glad that she helped him because his headache was impending and it felt like he was about to fall over at any minute. <br/>
<br/>
Her arm slipped around his waist when he inadvertently stumbled, nearly tripping over his feet and falling on his face. Her reflexes were quick and agile as she hoisted him up, leaning his body against hers. </p><p class="p1">“Thanks,” He says, feeling so embarrassed by his sloppiness. <br/>
<br/>
She gives him a small smile as they proceeded forward. She managed to help him up the flight of stairs that led to her porch. She held her grip around his waist as she inserted her key inside of the keyhole and twisted it open. She kicked the door open further with her foot, coaxing Diego carefully as she walked him over to the couch. </p><p class="p1">Just as he predicted the inside of the place was an exact reflection of the outside of her house; nice and voguishly decorated. Framed pictures of her and her family hung up on walls and were settled on display on tables. A comforting warmth filled the air, the scent of flowers fills his senses. </p><p class="p1">She pushed aside a clutter of clean clothes that were tossed on the couch, moving them aside so that she could lay Diego down. He grunts lowly, nearly falling into the soft plushness of her sofa cushions when he sits down. </p><p class="p1">Eudora, standing athwart from him, pushed a loose piece of hair from her face as she looked down at him. “Do you want water or–?” </p><p class="p1">He shakes his head, kindly denying her offer. His gaze lowers when she moves over and sits next to him on the couch. Her knee inadvertently brushed against his as she scoots closer. He can feel her staring intently at him; assessing, wondering. He doesn’t like it. Because with Eudora she was easy at reading him. With others it was so easy for him to placate this facade and maintain this barrier of not letting anyone in. </p><p class="p1">For some reason unbeknownst to him, he wasn’t as strong willed when it came to Eudora. He was powerless, helpless when it came to her. Part of him like it because she challenged him in ways others didn’t. They often challenged each other through flirtatious rebuttals. The other part loathed it because of how quick he would succumb to her docility. </p><p class="p1">He was never like this prior to meeting her. He was able to maintain this shielded wall that prevented people from prodding and getting him to let them in. </p><p class="p1">Eudora messed that up for him. </p><p class="p1">“Diego, I-” She begins, but is burlesquely cut off mid-sentence. </p><p class="p1">He shakes his head, scoffing lowly. He already knows what she’s about to say. But he didn’t want to hear it because it would just make him feel shittier he already felt. “No, Eudora. I don’t want to talk about how much of a fucking failure I am. I already know.” He doesn’t mean to be so lewd with his words as he talks to her but he’s still so angry by the events that occurred earlier. </p><p class="p1">“What? Diego, you’re not a failure.” <br/>
<br/>
“No?” He chuckles wryly, “Well then what else would you call someone who was only 2 months––” He enunciates, holding up two of his fingers for emphasis. “<em>2</em> <em>months</em> away from graduating the police academy but got kicked out?” When Eudora sits there, quiet, unsure of how to answer he wearily throws his hands in the air, nodding. “Exactly.” </p><p class="p1">Eudora couldn’t help but to sympathize for him. At first, she did harbor an unjust disdain towards him when they first met. She thought he was too jocular at the most inappropriate times, talked back too much and was nothing but a gloating show off. </p><p class="p1">Of course that perception changed greatly when they seemingly got closer and developed a friendship. Now, she sees that while he can still be an annoying condescending jackass a times, he was also sweet and caring. <br/>
<br/>
She was surprised when she heard the rumor of Diego’s expulsion. Though they all knew he could be a little ornery, he was the best officer in training at the academy. He passed all the physical exams and was deft in the self defense classes. </p><p class="p1">She initially presumed that those rumors were merely locker room talk just how most of everything was, speculation and rumors. She received the validity of her inquiry when she saw Diego sauntering out of the locker room, carrying his gym bag that was full of his gear. He didn’t meet her gaze as he walked past her, heading to the front door.</p><p class="p1">She stood there taut, aghast, and completely dumbfounded.</p><p class="p1">Eudora knew that this loss would be most hurtful for Diego as he dedicated the past half year in trying to excel at his training. They spent countless nights at the coffee shop and library studying for tests, woken up at the sunrise to get extra miles of jogging in, all to prepare for their exams. To get kicked out after all of that would be hurtful to anyone. <br/>
<br/>
She wanted to be there for him just in case he needed to talk. Eudora’s aware of his struggles with communication and grasping of coming to terms with feelings, which made it hard to talk to him at times because he could be so damn stubborn and emotionally repressed but she didn’t care. </p><p class="p1">“You could try again.” She surmised in a hopeful suggestion. </p><p class="p1">Rubbing a hand exasperatedly over his eyes, he shakes his head, defeat etched on his face. “I worked so hard and I barely made it through. I wouldn’t have gotten as far as I did if it weren’t for you. Starting over’s not an option.” </p><p class="p1">What he said was true had it not been for their countless late-night study sessions he would’ve failed the first test and would’ve flunked out the academy entirely. He was never good at academics, not even with homeschooling with his mother. It was always a struggle for him. </p><p class="p1">Without Eudora there to help him there’s absolutely no way he could pass those exams. Not to mention he was expelled, meaning that he wouldn’t be able to quality for eligibility of signing up again for three years. There was no way in hell he could wait that long. He already dedicated so much time into getting accepted the first time. Who knows if he would pass the basics again?</p><p class="p1">His pride was too strong for him to go back there again after being expelled anyway. He wouldn’t go crawling back to them after kicking them out for doing something that he thought was right. Sure, his tactics in going through with it violated the procedures but still he had succeeded in receiving the results. </p><p class="p1">He’s not denying his faults in this, but surely they could’ve at least given him some leeway since he was the only one to complete the training. Everyone else was struggling to even get past the first stage while he completed it in haste. </p><p class="p1">“You’re smart, you can get in again if you study. You’re already good at the physical stuff and hey, I can help you too if you want.” <br/>
<br/>
She knows that it’s his own fault for not obliging by the academy’s rules. He was already on thin ice by the Captain for all of the other prior occurrences his behavior today only enticed him to sever all ties with Diego’s position at the academy. </p><p class="p1">But she still couldn’t help but to feel bad for him. She’s never seen him so melancholic before. He’s either brooding or annoying her with that signature smirk that’s always curled on his lip but she’s never seen him so down like this. <br/>
<br/>
“No I-” He shrugged, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth. “I’m done with that place. My ways of trying to keep people safe might be different from the academy’s but it’s still just as efficient and if they can’t see that then that’s on them.” </p><p class="p1">“Well, what are you doing to do?” </p><p class="p1">“I don’t know yet. I’ll figure something out. I always do.” </p><p class="p1">All he’s ever wanted to do since he was a kid was to protect people and keep the city safe. It’s all he’s ever known. It’s what he did best. His learned techniques stemming from Reginald’s barbaric teachings from their training in the umbrella academy wasn’t the most proficient but using violence always got the results that he needed.</p><p class="p1">He left home in search of finding serenity of something that would be beneficial of his powers. He sought that within the academy. He wasn’t good with abiding by rules or listening but he was willing to try if that meant he would be able to do the thing that he loved most.  </p><p class="p1">If he could no longer do that at the academy then he would simply find some other place to do it; somewhere where he didn’t have to follow rules or worry about being too excessive with his violent force. </p><p class="p1">He’s retracted from his reverie by the feeling of Eudora’s hand resting genially on his leg. His eyes lower to her hand, then slowly trailing upward to meet her gaze. She’s looking at him with this undetectable expression marring her face caught between confusion and adulation. <br/>
<br/>
They sit there for a moment; staring intently into each other’s eyes. For a second, Diego foolishly believes that he sees her eyes hastily flicker down to his lips before snapping back up. His eyes drink her in; staring and ogling at her pulchritudinous features that adorned her face–eyes, beady, dark umber, lips succulent, prim bow and the perfect shade of rosy pink. </p><p class="p1">It had taken everything in him to not lean in and kiss her all those days they stayed up doing all nighter studying sessions. His fear and reluctance about her feelings towards him prevented him in doing so. </p><p class="p1">He wasn’t suave or blarney in any way whatsoever. His being homeschooled and only friends being his siblings resulted in his lack of communication skills especially pertaining to girls. He didn’t know how to properly flirt; what he did know was how to annoy someone (he excelled at that with Allison and Vanya), which was his way of displaying his affection for someone. </p><p class="p1">With Eudora they bantered back and forth, with no malice whatsoever entailing. He had gotten seemingly more confident over time as they began to spend more time together. He knew which buttons to push, how to get her riled up. They would argue but she would always smile before rolling her eyes and walking away from him. </p><p class="p1">But even then he wasn’t entirely sure how she felt about him. She liked him well enough to be around him and to talk to him but she hadn’t overtly displayed any signals that she felt the same way that he did. It worried him a little. <br/>
<br/>
Until now. <br/>
<br/>
She’s looking at him in a way she’s never looked at him before. It makes timid butterflies erratically swarm around his stomach. He’s staring back at her; nervous and waiting. Waiting for her to make a move because he doesn’t know if he has the courage to do it first.</p><p class="p1">Apparently neither does she. <br/>
<br/>
She taps his thigh, smiling gently at him before eventually removing her hand. Running her fingers through her hair, Eudora glances around her living room.  “The couch is pullout. I can bring you some extra blankets and pillows if you like.” </p><p class="p1">He blinks, taken aback. He tries not to let the disappointment show on his face. “Y-Yeah, that’s-thank you.” </p><p class="p1">“You’re welcome. Good night, Diego.” She said, hurriedly rising to her feet and scurrying out of the living room. When she walks into her bedroom she closes the door and sighed heavily in frustration. </p><p class="p1">Why, why was it so hard for her to tell him that she likes him? The words were right on the tip of her tongue waiting to spill over. But she relented at the last second as her cowardice settled in. <br/>
<br/>
Maybe she would tell him but today wouldn’t be the way. Not when he was drunk and vulnerable and still hurting. Besides, she didn’t even know how he felt about her. He was so hard to read at times she was surprised that he even had emotions. </p><p class="p1">They would flirt one day, then the next he would just avoid her as if nothing happened. Maybe she just envisioned their connection in her mind. <br/>
<br/>
They both laid down that night with the thoughts of the other wandering around in their minds. </p>
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